A Game of Thrones by George RR Martin

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Right now, I’m 70% into one of the most deliciously built worlds ever.

I realized somewhere between 20-30% that I should have waited till I was at least 24 to read this, but eh, I read my first BDSM book by Sylvia day or Shayla Black (I don’t remember) about Logan and Cherry when I was twelve.

The first thing I am going to say is:-

This book is so fucking long you could fit three Order of the Phoenix into it.

The second thing I am going to say is (well, its more of an ask):-

Can someone please do me a favor and kill the spineless motherfucking bitch Sansa?

Third thing:-

Can we please have more Arya in the next book?

Fourth thing (more of a confession really):-

I only picked up this book after I read on JMomoa’s wiki that he was Khal Drogo. I am in love with his body, so help me god.

Okay long story, you really should take my word on this, short:-
It’s all about the Iron Throne.

There, I said it.

It’s all about the throne. So far I have figured Lannisters, the queen’s family for those of you who are not in the know, or inbreeding bastards as I fondly call them, deserve to die in the most brutal way possible. Starks are either too good or too spineless for their own good and Jaime Lannister is a snake.

King Robert was a spineless bastard who cared way too much about his throne and too little about his people.

Sansa….I don’t even have words for to describe my hatred for the little bitch.

Arya is my favorite female character. Odd isn’t it? The only female in the whole book who I love is an eight year old girl?

Catelyn is a…well, she is…..pathetic really. No other word for it.

Eddard Stark, what kind of a name is that anyway, is the one male who could, notice I don’t say should but could, sit on the throne and manage it but alas, like always, the just have never wanted the throne.

Danerys (Mighta gotten the spelling wrong there) is a child. She is childish, immature but, and thank god for this, not a bitch.

I am not even going to talk about Viserys (Mighta gotten this one wrong too) and my contempt where he is concerned. All I am going to say is, he makes Dudley look like Pooh.

I don’t know whether I loved this book because I am not sure the word can apply over here. The title is truly justified though. Because this is all about that fugly Throne. It has too much, and I mean too much creepy sex between creepy brother and sister.

The Dothraki, ironically, are the most normal people in the whole book. I would said that I could get behind them had it not been for Khal Drogo’s monologue about crossing the sea and raping and plundering the King’s Lands and people. I can’t get behind that sorta shit. No matter what. Not to mention that I was seriously creeped out by the stallion’s heart thing.

But eh, we, the proud readers of supernatural fiction, have a stomach of steel. If we didn’t, well, we’d have puked a thousand times by now.

I liked Bran though. If that counts. And Jon Snow. I don’t know why I am still reading this book but there it is, this book has hooked me in.

I tell myself:-
Rika, you’re going to pick up a regency romance after this and forget all about the Iron Throne.
But I am lying to myself.

As soon as I finish this book I am going to pick up its sequel and jump into it.

BTW, is anyone else as excited as I am to see where Arya lands?

I haven’t reached there yet.

I will update the review when I finish the fuckin too long book.

Homemade Energy Bites {Clean Eating Recipe}

I am gonna make em…..when I can get my lazy ass away from the computer, that is.

Strong Like My Coffee

Confession: I eat and love packaged protein bars way too much. The nuttier, chunkier, chocolate-ier, the better. Mint Chocolate Quest Bars are my crack.

My favorite aisle in the Sprout’s store is the ‘nutrition bar aisle’ because SO MANY new brands and flavors of protein bars have popped up in the last couple of years. Anytime I see a new brand or flavor, I just have to try it. Luna, Clif, Quest, Kind, Larabar, Pure Protein, Raw Revolution, Nugo, Balance, Kashi – you get the picture.

Anywayyyys, my dependency on packaged bars to supply my protein and energy (or just satisfy my sweet tooth) sort of contradicts my goal to create a more ‘natural’ diet. I’ve been experimenting with lots of colorful and nutrient-packed Clean-Eating recipes over the past couple of years, and these power balls are my new clean alternative to the delicious-but-processed bar aisle!

Homemade Clean Eating Energy Bites on Strong Like My Coffee  Stronglikemycoffee.com

On Thursday…

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King Hall by Scarlett Dawn

I have waited a long while to write this review. I discovered King Hall around December last year and, I exaggerate not, it was just as good the fifteenth time I read it as it was the first.

Meet our prodigies:-

Lily Ruckler

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Ezra Zeller

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Pearl Cooper

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Jack Collins

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Okay so to say that I was shocked would be an understatement.

I had recently reread all of the Shelly Laurenston and her altego GA Aiken books and I was hooked into the concept of alpha female. I have discovered it is my favorite genre since then but all ranting aside….

Holy lord and his mother….

This book was amazing. I went into it thinking it was going to be another one of those not bad but not good books but it took me by surprise and smirked at me while I was down on the ground and reeling from the sheer awesomeness that is Scarlett Dawn.

Lily Ruckler is a hybrid child, vamp and shifter, but in no way did she hog the book like the Ember from Darkness did. This book had a plot and that plot was good. SD let us get acquainted with all of her characters in this first book and didn’t make the heroine virgin.

Thank the holy lord for that.

Not to mention, after the tragic incident in which Lily lost her mate, she didn’t pull a Bella. She went out there on a….ahem….spree of fucking.

And oh my god that scene where she confesses that she had sex with a bird shifter and had bird for dinner after it?

Hilarious!

Lily was just an NA with all the new adult problems and no solution for them. But she grew up and owned the shit when it was clear that she was going to be the next Queen Shifter.

The bonds of friendship that this book demonstrates are to perfection. All of them love each other like family and all of them are open about it. All of them have a space of their own in the book and all of them get a voice.

And thank god that there were no miscommunication problems.

There were some spectacularly common scenes like the Graduation and then there were some spectacularly cool scenes like the building of the dome of water.

There were fights, babysittings, action, tears, hot daddies (read:Antonio and Cahal), backstabbing bitches, fangs, hot men and their hotter than shit bodies and thank god, not much drama. This book had everything, every little step of the transition that Lily made from being a Sophomore to a badass (know what I mean? huh?huh?huh?) Prodigy Shifter.

My favorite thing about this book is that it’s heroine is not a helpless and spineless little bitch with too many hot men pining after her and her blushing virtue.

Cuz Lily had no virtue to speak of.

She has a sexual life, a Queenly life, a behind-the-walls life and she kept it all balanced with her focus on being queen, and she got the degree.

Speaking of degrees….

Was I the only one who wet my panties at Lily’s and Ezra’s dance or what?

And OMG all those embarrassing scenes with King Kincaid and King Venclaire catching Lily and Ezra together?

Ridiculously hilarious!

I can go on and on about my love of this book and Ezra and I do love him. Why would I not? He’s perfect.

None of the heroes are assholes. There are no communication problems. Through it all, they know that the three people they can depend on are the other three of their Quartet.

That scene when all of them are charged with changing diapers?
And then when all of them fall asleep in the limo on the way to Washington DC?
Oh and when they wake up on top of each other, with more than a few wandering digits, while they are camping?

I have laughed, cried, held my breath and cursed more times than I can count while reading this book and I can honestly say that this book will stay with me throughout my adulthood like Harry Potter and Percy Jackson remained with me throughout my childhood.

I am going to read this book again and again and again and hope to god that I never run out of books like this.

Chosen Thief by Scarlett Dawn

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I saw Caro

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I went

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I saw Sin

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I went

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I saw Leric

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I went

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I saw Brann

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I went

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I saw Merrick

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I went

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Oh mamma……

This book had all of the things that I look for in SD books. Namely:-

1. A warrior heroine with a spine of steel
2. A heroine who is sexually independent and rather demanding
3. A hero-or heroes-who were all unassholish. You don’t even know how rare that is. It’s practically nonexistent.
4. A heroine who is not a virgin.
5. An intro-series plot that I can follow
6. This was different from the King Trio. I thought that this would have at least some reflection of it but it was perfect and I was wrong. I’ve never been so glad to be wrong before.
7. The sexual tension….oh mamma…it practically jumped at you from the pages
8. Witty repartee
9. Troublemaker heroine
10. Humorous situations
11. Steamy, hot, rough, dirty-talking, panty-soaking, low-down sex
12. More info about the ever elusive Spirit Elementals
13. Vizoacs!!!!!!!!!!!!

This book was perfect.

There was just enough of Lily’s posse to keep me from nostalgia and there was just enough of Caro’s posse to hook me in.

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I am now patiently waiting(read: checking SD’s social network everyday and badgering her) for the next book. I want more Leric. I hope Caro has sex with Merrick and Brann and I hope she ends up with….well this is the difficult one.

Caro was on hell of a girl. She has a rough past she is not ashamed of. She has priorities she is not ashamed of. She has a body she is not ashamed of. She is witty, savvy with a gun, quick to the rescue, daredevil and a troublemaker.

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Sin is just everything that a girl needs. I would love to see his relationship with Caro or maybe some other girl in the future. He is the kind of guy that makes a perfect mate.

Leric….Leric…..Leric….
Hot, tall, black, dreadlocked, tattooed…..Leric….
Not to mention that attitude. He is protective of Caro without crowding her space and he pushes her to be the best. Not to mention….Tristan!!!!!D’ya love that tiger or what?

Not to mention Dawn’s naming Caro’s Vizoac Isolde. Bonny and Clyde. West and Buttercup and now Isolde and Tristan!

OMG!!!! Have I even mentioned how happy I am that Jack and Pearl are pregnant. I bet their child or Eric is going to be one amongst the next batch of prodigies. I mean, didn’t we see the same thing with Cahal and Ezra?

I am ranting, aren’t I?

But this book was so fuckin perfect!!!!!
Amazing!
And man that King Hall fiasco!

Am I the only one who finds London sort of adorable?

Okay that’s it for now.

Drink Deep by Chloe Neill

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Blurb:

Clouds are brewing over Cadogan House, and recently turned vampire Merit can’t tell if this is the darkness before the dawn or the calm before the storm. With the city iself in turmoil over paranormals and the state threatening to pass a paranormal registration act, times haven’t been this precarious for vampires since they came out of the closet. If only they could lay low for a bit, and let the mortals calm down.

That’s when the waters of Lake Michigan suddenly turn pitch black-and things really start getting ugly.

Chicago’s mayor insists it’s nothing to worry about, but Merit knows only the darkest magic could have woven a spell powerful enough to change the very fabric of nature. She’ll have to turn to friends old and new to find out who’s behind this, and stop them before it’s too late for vampires and humans alike.

Review:

First things first.

The series really took off for me with a new start and a brand new set of problems. I like that other factions of supes were introduced in the book. I liked Lorlei the Siren in particular. It was as if Ethan’s death gave the series a new life. I was beginning to think that Merit was unlike Bella and that she was ready to move on with Jonah but as the book progressed….stuff got interesting. I will be the first to admit that I love me some vampires (read:Ezra and Cahal Zeller) but I like that which is dead to stay dead.

I know that a lot of other readers were really happy about the newly resurrected Ethan SUllivan but it didn’t do shit for me.

And Frank….that mother-fucker has a place reserved in hell. He was obnoxious, over-bearing, arrogant, ill-tempered and immature. That was the point, I guess. It was why the dick Darius sent him there in the first place but somethings are just beyond my level of tolerance. Especially when the goddamn righteous people do nothing about it.

The Greenwich Presidium, like any other Empire which is a monopoly and has been in power for too long, is an abusive and hierarchical organization which is only concerned with its own position of power and maintaining that status. They are cruel and abusive to go with it and there is no balance to that. No one to keep them in check except for, apparently, the Red Guard but they haven’t done shit yet. They need to be taken down but no one gets behind it and all of them cower beneath the GP. Its nauseating.

What’s more nauseating is that the Master of the House don’t do shit about it. Masters, I read in the first or the second book of the series, were supposed to protect and care for their subordinates and damn the consequences. But Malik didn’t do shit when Frank put all of his people through that much passive-aggressive torture. Malik is not a good leader.

But all of this doesn’t even come close to the fact that Ethan was magically resurrected by Mallory and Mallory was sacrificed for it. That pisses me off more than anything else. The dead are supposed to stay dead regardless of their species and other things. From here on out, the book took a downturn for me.

The only reason I even finished it was because I needed to know the ending.

Merit has a serious case of martyrism and righteousness and I can’t get behind that.

So this is where I stop with this word torture and hope to hell that I don’t have to go through this again in a book.

0*

Twice Bitten-Chloe Niell

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So…on the quest to find books that were as stimulating as the Forever Evermore I stumbled across Chloe Neill and started the Chicagoland Vampires series.

And while Merit doesn’t even come close to Lily Ruckler or Caro Jules, she has a spine, she can dance, she is good with a sword, she has pride and doesn’t chase guys who have made it explicitly clear that they don’t want her.

On the other hand her romanticism of Ethan Sullivan is not something that I can take easily. He keeps hurting her and like a naive little girl she keeps falling for him.

Ethan Sullivan…he fits your typical paranormal hero to a T. Asshole, pretty, standoffish, strong, ‘Master’, revered, ex-gf issues……you get it. While you could debate originality in Merit’s character, Ethan is not at all original and quite frankly, a disappointment. Scarlett Dawn puts effort into making her characters different and she succeeds. But Neill has followed the same line as countless other urban-fantasy authors and, while the book was good, it’s nowhere near best.

The plot was also easy to follow without much suspense or much stimulation coming from any of the characters. The sex scene was written like in one of the YA books. I have to say, Scarlett Dawn and Ilona Andrews do it much better.

This book therefore has a 2* rating from me.